enrapturedface: i need a new face (ugh)
[personal profile] enrapturedface
 Even though he's still a kid, he's always watching out for me. He cheers me up whenever things seem bleak; supporting me from the sidelines.

Whenever I realize this, I feel more and more miserable...

People at the station are always talking about the rookie that ended up taking a child in out of guilt for not being able to do anything useful; they're constantly belittling me-- thinking I can't hear them (or maybe they just don't care).

Sometimes I wonder why I can't stop caring about what they say.

I know I can't take the place of his father and definitely not that of his grandfather-- even though I've known Quark for almost as long as he's been alive.

I've called up my mother so many times to ask for help, but always hang up before the call goes through. She's the type of person who doesn't show understanding for anyone's opinions other than her own-- and I've got a feeling that telling her I'm taking care of a small boy will only cause her to freak the hell out.

I haven't talked to my brother ever since he left home all those years ago. I don't know where he is and to an extent-- I don't care.

But I can't help but wonder...Would they say the same kind of things I hear from other people at work? Do they worry about how Quark will turn out because I'm taking care of him?

I don't have any confidence about the life that I've chosen. Being a single parent is hard but I don't regret it.

He doesn't say it directly....but I think Quark thinks we'll be just fine.

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enrapturedface: i think i found a dead body phi (Default)
Junpei Tenmyouji

May 2014

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